Do you have moments in your life where you think about all the things you want to change in your life? Set goals for what you want to change or achieve? Start a to-do list, start eating healthy again, increase your workout and exercise? Start making more time to see friends and family? Do you then find yourself slowly slipping after a week of all these changes? Slowly ditching the good habits and going back to the bad habits you wanted so badly to change?
You tell yourself you will take a day off from the gym because you need a rest day, then you choose to go out with some friends, and you will treat yourself to just 1 (yeah right!) drink because you deserve it after being so good all week. Before you know it its midnight, you’ve had over 5 drinks, you’re tipsy and are heading over to get those greasy carbs before you stumble home. The next morning you’re hungover, dehydrated, tired, bloated and not motivated. You’re feeling guilty because you were so good all week, and now you have ruined all the progress you made. You spiral… That 1 rest day turns into 3 days of unhealthy bad habits. Then it’s a week, then a month.
3 months later you realise your still paying for that gym membership you never use, you feel guilty, and so the cycle starts again. We keep on the hamster wheel of life, where guilt guides us.
At what point is it enough and you start making real changes that last?
Do you even know how? Where do you start? If you google it, you will get flooded with millions of websites and articles that tell you the 5 easy steps to change your life for the better!
You see the problem with wanting to change so quickly is that we set ourselves up to fail that way. We build up ridiculous expectations and expect to see progress immediately. Eat a salad and go to the gym once and you wake up the next morning expecting to have abs. I know I have done that so many times. We think that we need to make drastic changes and make them quickly to see quick results. We are so used to being able to have what we want straight away that we think we can make real lasting changes overnight.
You want long hair? Done! Hair extensions. You want longer nails? Done! Acrylic nails. Want a Kardashian butt? Done! Liposuction & BBL. Want the latest phone, bag, shoes? Done! Credit card. We very rarely feel the joy in working hard for something we really want. We want instant gratification.
Real change within ourselves takes time. It takes small but accurate steps to have these changes last for the long term. You really need to think about what changes you want to make and what these changes mean to you. Think on a detailed level of what has to happen for you to achieve these changes. Be real with yourself, how long would it REALLY take you to achieve what you want. Set up a main goal, and then small sub-goals to keep you motivated and accountable.
Have you ever thought about why you actually want this change? With so much pressure from society we tend to allow outside influences to dictate the things we ‘want’ in life. The only time change really sticks is when we want it for ourselves, not because society told us so. Its only authentic if it comes from within and it will make us happy. Its fake if we are hoping that the change we make is so that we will be accepted by others.
Creating change within ourselves that sticks is not easy, but so worth it. We just need to keep reminding ourselves why we want it. A life coach is a great tool to help with this. Finding the right person to work with is crucial though. Find a coach you vibe with and it will make the process more enjoyable.